My Heart Is His
by Darkiise
Summary: After leading a terrible and miserable life Draco realises he never actually stopped loving Harry and he will do all it takes to get him. Draco/Harry fic. Rated M for later chapters. x
1. Realization

_Everything is not as it seems._

Chapter 1 – Realization

The crackling fire, the soft velvet, the silence of the house. I sit here alone. I seem to be alone a lot these days. Scorpius is at my parents most of the time, I wonder if he still knows that I'm his father.

I look at the drink in my hand. Why do I drink when I have nothing to be sad about? My wife died, sure, but I never loved her. Pansy. She loved me. I never loved her. Sometimes I sit and wonder why I even married her. I suppose it was to prove a point to Harry that I can have a normal relationship with someone. When I found out Pansy was pregnant I felt, for once, happy. My feelings for her stayed the same, nothing changed there. When Scorpius was born I felt a strong need to protect him and love him forever. I was so proud of him. It was a few weeks later that Pansy died.

It struck me more then I expected. With her gone, I begun to realise how much I needed her. I say I never loved her but she was my best friend, someone who I could talk to, someone who understood me. She knew the reason why I married her and she didn't mind. I got to prove myself and she got the guy she wanted. She didn't mind that I didn't want her in the same way that she wanted me.

The wine glass is now empty and I am too lazy to grab the half-empty bottle on the coffee table. I sigh and slide back in my arm chair. My family and friends expect to find me drunk, slumped in this chair with a scruffy suit and stubble. I will never let myself get in that state. I may be lonely, I may be upset but I am only 22 so I will not waste my life in such a pathetic way.

Scorpius will be coming home tomorrow. I've not seen him in 3 days. My parents only take him away for a few days at a time. They think that by doing this I will get some peace. They are wrong. I want to have my son around all the time. He is the only person in this world that I truly care about. He looks so much like me. Some people think he's a clone. I think I'll treat him. I'll take him to the beach. Yeah, the day after tomorrow I'll take him. The last time we went out anywhere was… never now I come to think about it. I have to cheer up for him. My life maybe on the down but I don't want it to affect him. I don't want him to be the person I was.

At Hogwarts I roamed around like I was king. I was always trying to be better then everyone else. I had my little gang and my bodyguards. I was seen as fearful by some because of my family name. I acted upon that. I became a dickhead because of that. I was so far up my own arse. The only people that ever got me down off my high horse were Harry and his friends. They saw through my shit. When I first met Harry he turned me down for friendship. Ever since that day I tried my best to piss him off and make him look like the loser. I should have known that that would never work. He was far too famous for that and also it didn't help that he always did these amazing acts of bravery. I hated him back then. I hated him for the status he had and the understanding friends he had. I thought he had it all but when I thought about it I realised that he must have felt so alone. No caring family, no parents. No wonder Molly Weasley took him under her wing.

I think Harry became an obsession of mine. At every chance I got I had to confront him, I had to try to make some sly comment or some ridiculous spell. I could tell that sometimes I got under his skin, that I had gone too far. In our second year I had to duel against him. At this point in time everyone knew that Harry and I didn't particularly like each other and so this duel was going to be very interesting. I felt so proud of myself when I cast Serpensotia and saw Harry's face when the snake appeared. When he started talking to it all I could think of was that he was a freak. Later that night I became jealous, that now he had something else that was amazing and I didn't have it. I knew I could never have it; it's not something you can just learn.

In the 4th year I realised what I was doing. It was when Harry confronted me after I told him that my father and I had made bets on him. I jumped out of the tree and I thought I had the upper hand. I didn't realise that Mad-Eye (Barty Crouch Jr.) was watching. He humiliated me in front of everyone and I saw Harry laugh. After Professor McGonagall transformed me back I ran. I left my friends, I had to be on my own. I cried my heart out. All I could think was _why was he laughing at me? Why does this hurt so much?_ That was when I realised what I was feeling. I had fallen in love with Harry James Potter, and it was killing me.

At the beginning of my 6th year Voldemort had asked me to complete a task which he knew that I would not be able to fulfil. There were two parts to this task. To get the deatheaters into Hogwarts and to kill Dumbledore. One day I stressed out and went into the boys bathrooms and threw water on my face. I looked in the mirror at myself. I looked so thin, so pale. Those tasks were taking the life out of me. Harry hated me more then ever. He came into the bathroom and I knew I wouldn't be able to stand conversation with him. I told him to leave me alone but he wouldn't. We cast spells at each other. The bathroom was torn apart. Then Harry cast sectumsempra. That really ripped me apart. I felt like I was dying. I lost hope, I wanted to die so then I wouldn't have to go on living knowing that Harry hated me. But I had to be saved didn't I?

The fire is low now and almost dead. I'm crying and I shouldn't be. I was always told to leave the past in the past. But I can't. I can't change what happened. Back in those days I knew that Harry would never see me like I saw him. Just like the situation between me and Pansy.

I was in my final year when Harry found out. I was home for Christmas and I had an argument with my Aunt Bellatrix. I had to get out of the manor. I ran to the river that runs past our manor. I sat there and just looked into the water. It was getting dark and becoming quite cold. I was just about to go back inside when I heard the pop. I looked around and saw Harry. I got to my feet immediately and just stared at him. I thought I was hallucinating until he spoke.

"What are you looking at?"

Then I knew it was him.

"Well I was just wondering why your in my garden?"

"In you're what?"

"Garden Potter. That's my manor up there. You're on my property and I think it should be you who should explain yourself."

"I had to get away."

"Away from?"

"None of your business Malfoy."

"Where have you been all year? You should be at Hogwarts."

"And again, it's none of your business."

He began to annoy me terribly and I began to shake. Harry noticed this from me which made matters worse.

"Did I strike a nerve Malfoy? I bet it really bugs you that you're not allowed to know what's going on when you're meant to have the upper hand."

"Yes actually it fucking does."

"Oh, muggle language. I always thought you didn't like muggles."

"What ever Potter. Now piss off, you're not meant to be here."

"I can be where I like."

"No you can't."

I took a step towards him. He then took a step towards me and said;

"Oh really Malfoy?"

"Yes, really."

"Well make me leave then."

At this point we were just a foot apart. We were glaring at each other, the tension building. Then I had to go and make matters worse. I went forwards and let my lips come into contact with Harry's. At first Harry didn't do anything then when the initial shock past he pushed me off him and I landed in the shallow part of the river.

"WHAT THE FUCK MALFOY? WHAT THE FUCK?"

I had frozen. I couldn't believe I had just done that. I put my head in my hands.

"ARE YOU ACTUALLY THAT INSANE? WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE PLAYING AT?"

"Stop shouting please."

"WHY SHOULD I? YOU JUST KISSED ME?"

"Please, I don't want my family to hear. You don't know how bad it would be if they found you here."

"Ok I'll stop shouting. Why did you kiss me?"

"Oh Harry, I wish I could tell you but then I would fear that you would hate me even more."

"I don- did you just call me Harry?"

"Yes, that is your name isn't it?"

"Yes. It was just strange that you called me by my first name."

"Well I don't hate you."

"I don't hate you Malfoy, I just don't like the way you are. You could do so much better with yourself."

"I love you Harry."

"What the? I say something sort of positive and now you love me!"

"I've loved you for a long time Harry."

Harry began to back away and I started to get worried. I realise now that I shouldn't have told him that way. I leant forward and put my glass on the table. I got out of my chair and headed to my room. Once there I started a fire in the fireplace. I opened the draw in my desk and took out the bunch of letters that were tied up with string. I unfastened it and picked up the first letter. They were all from Harry.

_1__st__ January_

_Draco,_

_What happened 2 weeks ago is a serious issue. I don't understand why you think you love me. I think this needs to be sorted out. Everything needs to be laid out on the table. We need to see things clearly. I want to know where things got messed up because I'm sure that I've not being giving off vibes towards you and if you get kicks out of me being mean towards you then I think there is something really wrong with you. I want to you to get over me Draco but first I want you to tell me, tell me what it is about me you like. Tell me when it started and what you did after that. For me to help you I need you to help me._

_Harry._

I remembered my reply. That night I had been so emotional. To think that Harry cared. After a few weeks of contact by letters Harry and I had begun to get angry with each other. I think he was getting really stressed out at the fact that I loved him and I wouldn't change the way I felt. He eventually wrote;

_29__th__ January_

_Draco,_

_You do not love me Draco, you are not homosexual. You are confused! I wish you would stop pretending that you have feelings for me. It's not right, the way you are! You're under a delusion. I wish you would just lead a normal life! I want you to prove me that you are capable of that. Please Draco._

_Harry._

That letter broke my heart. I thought he understood but all that time he was just waiting to spring that on me. I thought he cared, I thought he wanted to help me but no. That was when I came up with the idea that if I went off with Pansy then Harry would come running. I even married her because I thought that would do it but Harry didn't care. He just sent me a present and one more letter saying that he was glad I was normal.

I place the letters back in the draw not bothering to tie them back up. I take off my clothes and slip into bed. A sharp pain in my chest comes about and I now realise that I'm still in love with him. I'm still in love with Harry James Potter.


	2. Realtà e Fantasia

_Reality and Fantasy can not coexist. _

Chapter 2 - Realtà e Fantasia

Yesterday Scorpius and I went to the beach. He was amazed at the sight of it. He had never been before and seeing his happiness made me happy. It healed me from the pain from the other night. Scorpius paddled in the water and built sandcastles. He had fish and chips then an ice-cream. He loves the muggle life and quite frankly I do too. It's so different to what I expected it to be. Everything was going very well until Scorpius came over to me and asked;

"Father, isn't that Albus over there?"

I looked over and I saw young Albus with his older brother James and his younger sister Lily. I looked around for there parents but I didn't see them. I walked over to them and Scorpius started to play with Albus.

"Hi James, where's your parents?"

"Oh hi Draco. There just getting the beach stuff from the car. They'll be here in a minute."

"Ok, just checking that you weren't on your own."

We exchanged smiles and I turned my attention on the parking lot. I noticed Ginny's bright fiery hair strait away. She noticed me and waved. I automatically waved back. Then Harry appeared. My heart dropped. My smiled faded. I didn't need this. I knew he'd be here. I knew I should have disappeared but I had to stay. They headed over and said our hellos.

"Draco, do you and Scorpius want to join us?"

"Oh please father can we? Can we?"

"Well I really must be going."

"Come on Draco," said Harry, "I'm sure you can spare an hour."

"Ok then."

I knew I had to take Scorpius home, I knew I had to leave but I couldn't. It would have upset Scorpius if I had taken him away. Ginny set down a blanket then helped her children into swimwear. They grabbed buckets and spades and went off to build a fort, taking my son with them. I sat myself down next to Ginny and just looked out at the sea. The light blue sky contrasting with the darker blue waters then that contrasting against the almost white sand. It seemed too beautiful to be true. It looked like a scene from a fantasy film. I began to daydream.

**The sun set, me, Harry, walking down the waterline, holding hands. Then I stop, grab him by the waist and kiss him. He kisses me back and runs his perfect hands through my hair. He pushes me back and we fall onto the sand. We keep on kissing, it feels like we're never going to stop. The tides coming in and the first wave just touches our feet. We smile at each other and carry on.**

"Draco? You there."

I blinked and looked up to see Harry. He was so beautiful, I thought he was an angel. It was then I realised that he was trying to get my attention.

"Yeah, what was that you asked?"

"I need help looking after the kids when they go into the water, want to come?"

"Yeah, sure."

I smiled at him and stood up. I started walking over to the water when Harry stopped me. His touch made me shiver.

"Yes Harry?"

"You're not going in the water?"

"I only have these set of clothes. I can't get them wet."

"Well I have a spare pair of trunks if you want to borrow them?"

"Ok, thank-you."

We walked over to Ginny and she passed me the trunks. I went to my car and got changed. When I returned I saw Harry in his, and that was all he had on. I felt a movement in my lower regions. _Oh not now, please!_ I tried to act as normal as possible. We walked down to the water with our children and watched over them play. When the waves hit my feet I was reminded of my fantasy. I smiled.

"What are you so happy about?" Harry asked.

"Just a thought I had."

"Care to tell?"

"No, I don't think so Harry."

"Ok, I understand."

He understood. He didn't act all pissy, he acted like he cared. I felt like me and Harry were getting on but I didn't want to make any wrong move that might have made him back away from me so I lightly kicked some water at him. He looked at me with a shocked face, then he laughed and got me back. _That is it _I thought _this is war!_ I splashed even more water at Harry and again he got be back. I tackled him and we both fell into the water. I thought I had gone too far but he was happy and laughing. I finally began to relax. The kids saw us and came over to join in. We were all having so much fun.

"Father, may I have a drink."

"Sure Scorpius."

I stand up out of my velvet chair and walk to the kitchen with my son toddling behind me. I got out a beaker and filled it up with orange juice. He took it and hugged me. He left. I look out of the window into my garden. It was so full and so empty. The towering trees, the round bushes and the colourful flowers. There's some bird houses and bird feeders out there within the jungle. I like to help out the wildlife as much as I can. I feel like it's a good thing to do.

It is 1am in the morning. Scorpius went to bed ages ago and he would be well asleep by now. My room is warm and I'm lying naked in my bed. Harry's creeping back into my thoughts again. The sight of him in barely anything, and wet. I know its wrong to think about him like this but I can't help myself. I reach under the duvet and grab my dick. I begin to move my hand up and down. The more I think about him the faster I go. The pleasure of this is so intense and my arm is beginning to hurt. I want to stop because of the pain but the pleasure feels so good. I have to keep on going, I have to. After what feels like forever I reach my climax.

The release, the amazing feeling of this moment. I lay back and take a breath. Sweat is rolling down my face. Now more then ever I want Harry. Why does he have to be strait? Reality sucks.


	3. True Colours

_Love will crescendo._

Chapter 3 – True Colours

What do you do when you think someone cares? You act all happy and suck up to that person. You can't help but be nice, you just forget what happened in the past and start looking forward to the future. I now realise I can have it all. I can do what I want and I can get away with it. He's under my power and he can't escape me. He's shown his true colours to me now and that is what is important. I know there were factors like he was drunk but that doesn't matter. Aren't people meant to tell the truth when there drunk? Yes I know he didn't actually say anything but that's not the point. He showed me.

A few weeks after the beach I got a letter from Ginny asking me if I wanted to go on a night out with her, Harry, Ron, Hermione and George. I found it strange that she even asked me to go. It's not like the rest of them like me. But Harry was going to be there so I had to say yes. It was a Monday that I got the letter and the night out was going to be on the Friday, naturally. At first I thought I wouldn't be able to go because Scorpius was going to be home but then my mother called round and asked if she and my father could have him for the weekend. I told her she could immediately and she was intrigued as to why I was so eager to send Scorpius round to there's.

"I'm going out Friday night."

"That's great! It has been such a long time since you've gone out. Who are you going with?"

"Harry and a few of his friends."

"Harry Potter?"

"Yes mother."

"I didn't know you were friends with him."

"You don't like me being friends with him? I'm 22 mother!"

"I do like you being friends with him. It shows that you two have put the past in the past and are starting afresh."

"Yeah, we are."

On the Friday my father picked up my son and told me he'd bring him back around 6pm on Sunday. Once they'd left I headed out to the shops in search of a new outfit. I went into Madam Malkin's Robes for All Occasions.

"I'll be there in a minute" I heard a voice saying from the back of the shop. I smiled. Madam Malkin was always busy with something. I walked over to where the Hogwarts robes were. I picked up a Slytherin one. To me it looked rather small and laughed at the fact that I used to fit into a robe that size. A memory came back to me. The first time I saw Harry was in that shop.

"Ahh Master Draco how can I help you? It's not time for Master Scorpius to go to Hogwarts is it? No it can't be."

"No Madam Malkin, not just yet, he has another 9 years to go. I'm here to get a new outfit."

"What is the occasion if you don't mind me asking sir?"

"I'm going out with a few friends of mine this evening."

"This evening?! You expect me to make something for you in less then 10 hours! I know I'm good but I'm not that good!"

"I'm only asking for something simple. It's not a robe so it shouldn't take that long."

"Oh, I'm interested. What is it would you like me to make?"

"A silk shirt, slightly tight around the body and a little loose on the arms."

"That sounds very nice. Any particular colour?"

"Have you still got that black silk that has the hint of green?"

"Why yes I do. It's a good job you came to me now. It's running out fast. Right, let me get you measured up. Please take off your cloak and shirt."

I took them off just as she asked. I could see in her eyes that she had admired me but then must of wiped the thought from her mind for she was a lot older then I. I smiled at her. Her face grew a bright pink colour.

"Oh you don't have to be embarrassed around me Madam Malkin."

"I'm sorry Master Draco. You really have grown up. You are so much more beautiful then you were when you were younger."

"Thank you very much."

I held up my arms and she measured me up. Once she had finished I got dressed and stood by the counter. The old witch ran about the place, jotting things down and brining out fabric. She seemed to have forgotten me. I gave a slight cough and she whirled around.

"Oh I'm so sorry. I've never had to make something like this before and I'm so exited."

"Would you like me to pay now?"

"No, you can pay me when I've finished. I'll estimate a price when I see your reaction."

We laughed, I waved and left.

A few hours later after I had gotten some money out of Gringotts Bank, bought a pair of black jeans and a new pair of thin, black converse with dark green laces I went back to Malkin's. As soon as she saw me she pulled out a package from under the counter. She seemed to forget the wizards she was serving. They all looked round at me, clearly wondering what was so important. When they recognised who I was they seemed to look uncomfortable.

"Ahh Master Draco I've been waiting for you!"

"I'm sorry, I had to get some other things from muggle London."

"That's ok, now here is your shirt, I want you to try it on so I can see if it needs tweaking and also so I can see how much more amazing you will look."

I gave a slight chuckle and again for the second time that day took off my shirt and cloak. There were a few witch girls in the store as well, clearly soon to be sixth year Hogwarts students. They giggled when they saw my body. _How childish_ I thought.

I opened the package and took out the shirt. Already it looked amazing. I was about to say something but Madam Malkin stopped me.

"Ahh, don't say anything yet. Put it on!"

I unfastened the buttons and slid my arms down the sleeves. I pulled it on and fastened the buttons back up, leaving the top 3 undone. Malkin pulled a mirror over towards me and I turned to look into it. I gasped. It was exactly how I wanted it to be. It was tight but loose at the same time. It was just right. I couldn't keep the smile off my face.

"Oh Draco, it looks perfect. I don't need to change it one bit!"

"So go on, tell me how much it costs?" I grinned.

"Nothing. Just for you."

"I have to pay something, you spent your valuable time on it."

"No you don't. Just take it."

"I will pay for it." I took out 3 galleons and placed them on the counter. I heard gasps from the other people in the shop.

"Master Draco, that is far too much!"

"Nonsense Madam Malkin. This shirt is perfect. It is exactly how I wanted it to be."

I think she took a risk because she hugged me. I made an old woman very happy.

After that I went home. I had a few hours before I had to get ready. I spent them reading a book. When the time came I got into my new out fit and looked at myself in the mirror. I had done well in shopping today. My eyes then came across my hair. It was always flat, neat, tidy. It had to be because of the family I was from. I combed it through and held my wand to my head. I thought of an image and said the spell which would change my hair to how I imagined. My hair was slightly ruffled but it finished off my image perfectly. No man or woman could resist.

Harry came around at 7pm on the dot.

"Hey Harry, where is everyone else?"

"Ginny is just dropping the children off at her mothers and we'll meet everyone else there."

"Ok. I'm a little nervous."

"How come?"

"Well from what I remember Ron, Hermione and George don't particularly like me."

"I've been talking to them and they don't mind. They say as long as you don't insult them or do anything old you-ish then everything will be fine."

"Alright then."

_10 minutes, just me and Harry, in an enclosed space, I hope I can control myself _was what I thought. He put on the radio and muggle dance music came on. I began to laugh and he threw me a look that I couldn't quite describe.

"What's up Harry?"

"Why are you laughing?"

"Oh it's nothing."

"No, tell me."

"Why do you wanna know?"

"Just tell me Draco."

"I've heard this song before. When I first heard it I was with Pansy and her reaction to it was hilarious. I always loved it when she laughed like that."

"Ahh, ok, sorry."

"Sorry for what?"

"Nothin', don't worry about it."

"Ok then…"

Silence fell over us. Harry must have felt like he had said something wrong. He hadn't. But he didn't know that me and Pansy weren't like he thought we were. He didn't know that I didn't love her. We continued the silence till we got to the car park of the club. As we got out of the car I wondered how Harry was going to get home.

"Harry, are you leaving your car here overnight?"

"No, Ginny's gonna drive it home."

"She not drinking?"

"No, she doesn't like it."

"Okay then. Let's go inside."

We paid £5 to get in. The music was really loud and I couldn't hear a word Harry was saying. From what I could see he shook his head and then laughed. He then came closed to me, he was just millimetres away..

"The others will be up in our V.I.P area."

"You have you own V.I.P area?"

"Yeah, the people who own this club are wizards."

"Makes sense."

We looked at the hundreds of people dancing. I wondered how the hell we were going to get through them all. I think Harry must have thought the same thing. He grabbed my wrist and he barged through the dancers, pulling me along. To have Harry so close then touching me was too much. My cock became hard and I had no way of hiding the bulge. Thankfully Harry didn't notice because it was so dark. I wanted to stop him from walking and pull him towards me.

Ahead the V.I.P sign got ever closer and I didn't want it to come so quick, but it did. When we got there Ron, Hermione, Ginny and George said hi and moved around for us to sit. They welcomed me like I was one of their own, like we had been friends for years. They talked about random things. I didn't join in the conversation, I was far too worried that I would say something wrong.

"Hey Draco, what would you like to drink?" asked George.

"Erm, I don't know, what have they got?"

"Come with me, you can help me carry the drinks back."

"Ok."

George got up and so did I. The bar wasn't that far away. I looked over the counter and saw so many colourful liquids. I didn't know what to pick.

"What would you recommend?"

George looked up and down and then turned to me.

"Well there is alcopops, wine, beer, cocktails and spirits."

"You pick for me, I'll just go with the flow."

George smiled like I had made a very good choice. He got me a green colour drink. I didn't ask what it was. I took a sip and it was so nice. We headed back over to the V.I.P area. The girls had gone out onto the dance floor so it was just us guys.

"So, Draco, how are you these days? Doing much?" I could see that Ron still didn't like me that much from the tone of his voice.

"I'm spending more time with Scorpius, I feel like I can move on now. Pansy wouldn't have wanted me to be doing nothing for the rest of my life. I'm thinking about re-vamping my house. It's so old."

"You never spent much time with your son?"

"No, I love him to pieces but I couldn't be around anyone."

"Some father you are." He whispered it so low that I almost didn't hear him.

"What was that Weasley?"

"Now, now," Harry said, "Calm down you two."

"I'm sorry Draco but you have to understand. All my school life I never particularly liked you so being here with you now is kind of getting on my nerves. But you're now my sister's and Harry's friend so I suppose I'll have to get to understand you and like you."

"Well that sounds alright with me." I said. I smiled at him and to my delight he smiled back. If I can become friends with Harry's then that means I'll be closer to him. Damn I'm thinking like a stalker which is not a good thing.

Hours past and more and more drinks were flung down peoples throats. I noticed that everyone began to loosen up then get a little wilder. It was nearing 1:30am when it happened. Harry seemed to be way more drunk then anyone else. He pulled me to my feet and said;

"Draco! Yyyyou haven't danced tonight 'hic'"

He dragged me to the dance floor and begun to dance. I felt so shy. I had never done this before. It seemed like all the alcohol in me had gone because of how scared I was to dance. Harry took my hands in his and danced. At that point I had an adrenaline rush and just let my feet take me away. It was only a few moments later that Harry said he didn't feel well. I took him to the toilets.

Once in there he ran into one of the toilet cubicles. I looked around. The room was lit with a low blue light. A bit of graffiti covered the far wall. The urinals looked a little grubby.

"You alright Harry?"

No sound came. I walked over to the cubicle and knocked on the door. He hadn't locked it and it opened. He was just standing there with his head bent down.

"Harry?"

He stood up strait and turned around. He pulled me in, closed the door and locked it. He then pushed me up against the side and ran his hands down my body and paused just above my crotch.

"Draco, you look super hot in that shirt you know. I want to know what's underneath."

I didn't stop him. Not just because I wanted it, also because I was really shocked. He looked at me, gave a cute smile and bit his lip in a sexy way. I couldn't help it anymore and my hands found their way up Harry's shirt. He half giggled and kissed me.

"Harry, what are you doing?"

"Isn't this what you want?"

"Yes but-"

"Shut up and kiss me."

With that invitation I couldn't stop my self. I became the one with the control. I over powered him and pushed myself so close against him. I felt his erection against my own. I could feel him smile as we kissed. I then moved my hand down his body. I was just about to slide my hand down his trousers when a familiar voice echoed through the room.

"Harry? Draco? You guy's in here."

I stopped what I was doing immediately. Harry was still trying to kiss me.

"We're in here Ron!"

I pushed Harry to the floor and bent his head over the toilet.

"Now pretend to be sick, don't argue."

I then unlocked the door and opened it to find a worried looking Ron.

"I've been looking for you two everywhere! What are you doing in here and why is your shirt open?"

"Harry felt a bit ill so I brought him in here. He fell down and grabbed onto my shirt to keep him upright but he tore it open."

"Right… Ok then…"

I stepped to the side to show Ron.

"Shit Harry! Come on, it's time to go home."

"Does he always get this drunk?"

"No. It's strange really."

I was dropped off home and went to bed.

What do you do when you think someone cares? You act all happy and suck up to that person. You can't help but be nice, you just forget what happened in the past and start looking forward to the future. I now realise I can have it all. I can do what I want and I can get away with it. He's under my power and he can't escape me. He's shown his true colours to me now and that is what is important. I know there were factors like he was drunk but that doesn't matter. Aren't people meant to tell the truth when there drunk? Yes I know he didn't actually say anything but that's not the point. He showed me.


	4. Confessions and Kisses

_Sleeping with the enemy._

Chapter 4 – Confessions and Kisses

"Hi Harry, what do you want?"

"I want to talk to you, about the other night."

"What about it?"

"Don't fuck around with me Draco."

"Oh I wish."

"Shut up!"

"Bye then."

I put down the phone. I had gotten to him. He can't keep me off his brain. I've set the hook in deep. He'll end up coming over. He won't be able to resist. It has been 3 days since the incident at the club. I am surprised that Harry has been able to avoid me for this long. Maybe I'm losing my touch.

*An hour later.*

I look at the man sleeping next to me. I can't help but smile. Harry had come around about 5 minutes after the very short telephone call. He just barged in without even knocking.

"That is very rude Harry."

"Don't call me that."

"What? Your name."

"Yes my name."

I laughed at him. He clearly had a guilty conscience. I walked over to him and gently ran my fingers down the left hand side of his face. He inched back at first then he came back to me. At my touched he closed his eyes and tilted his head back a little. I could see tears forming and flowing. This knocked me back a little.

"Harry, what is it? What's wrong?"

"Why? Why does this have to happen?"

He dropped to his knees and covered his face with his hands. I came down to him and lifted up his chin with my hand.

"What has to happen Harry? Tell me."

"I thought it happened because I was drunk, well that is what I was telling myself. All these years of no contact at all and now. Why do I have to be reminded? It's wrong! I'm wrong. I'm dirty! I don't deserve Ginny and my children. IT'S ALL A LIE!"

With this he crashed his lips onto mine, knocking me back onto the wooden floor of the hallway. Harry seemed to have gained a great power because I couldn't get him off me, not that I wanted that to happen. He tore off my shirt and kissed my neck, down to my collar bone, down my chest and stopped at the jeans button. He looked up at me, tears still in his eyes, and slightly smiled.

"Why did you make me feel like this Draco?"

"Feel like what?"

"Like I want you."

"Woah, Harry, not now, not now!"

I stood up and grabbed the parts of my shirt. I took them into the kitchen and threw them into the bin. I then walked over to the sink and splashed water onto my face, tying to make myself come to my senses. I heard Harry come in.

"What did I say?" He asked with an innocent tone.

"Why do you tell me this now?"

"I…I don't know."

"How long?"

"Hm?"

I felt like crying, I turned around to face him.

"How long have you felt like this towards me?"

"Ever since our 4th year at Hogwarts."

I was speechless. Why the fuck was he telling me now? Why couldn't he have said something back then? WHY?! I began to feel angry. I couldn't stand to be in the same room as him.

"You know Draco, seeing you stand there, no shirt, all wet, you're kinda turning me on."

"Oh fuck off Harry!"

I stormed past him and went up to my bedroom. I slammed the door behind me.

"What the fuck does he think he's playing at?!"

I shook my head and grabbed a towel. I begun drying my hair. _Don't cry now!_

Everything I've ever wanted is downstairs and I'm pushing it away. It's all too complicated now! I have a son, he has a family. It could never work without someone being hurt. I could have dealt with the kisses but the confessions… I wasn't expecting them.

*knock*

"Draco, can I come in?"

"No! Fuck off."

He didn't listen. He came into my room and came and sat next to me on my bed.

"Please don't be mad at me Draco. I was so confused and young back then. I didn't realise that what I felt was real."

"You make no sense. How could you have wanted me all this time?"

"I figured that you would know the answer to that. You've wanted me all this time."

"It was want at first."

"At first?"

"It became a need. Harry. I love you, that is what makes my situation different. I never loved Pansy. She knew it and I think that somewhere deep down in you all those years ago you knew it too. She didn't mind that I loved you and not her. She got me, you never did. She was my best friend. I would have given her the world."

"I think you did love her."

"Well you think wrong."

I felt the anger within me rise again. I didn't want to shout at him anymore. I love him and I never want to hurt him. He put his arm around me and I let myself rest on him.

"I wanted to tell you everything before anything happens between me and you Draco."

"What?" I sat up and looked at him. I didn't realise what he was trying to say.

"Draco, just because I'm married to someone doesn't mean I can't fool around with someone else."

"You really want to break the promises you made to Ginny. If that's what you intend on doing then what sort of man does that make you?!"

"Please don't get mad again. I can't help it as you very well know."

"Do I?!"

"Yes Draco, you do. I know that you think that what I am saying is wrong but I know you can't turn off your feelings."

Harry began to lean towards me. I only had a few seconds to make up my mind. I let him kiss me, then again and again.

"Does this mean you want me no matter what I do?"

I thought over it. How could anyone ever find out?

"I want you Harry."

"Good."

He climbed on top of me and began to kiss me. I kissed him back and slowly took off his shirt. I didn't want this moment to rush by and I think Harry understood that. I took off my jeans as did he. I laid down on my back and wrapped my legs around his neck. His dick went into me and the pain was excruciating. He began to move back and forth ever so slowly, to ease the pain out. After a few moments all I could feel was the pleasure. At the same time Harry took a hold of my dick and began to toss me off. The pleasure of it all was far too much. My back arched and I held onto the sheets. I could feel myself rising in temperature and sweat beginning to form. I looked up at Harry and he too was in the same state. He was wet and smiling. I laughed out loud and began to moan.

"Oh Draco…"

"Fuck me Harry!"

That was the second best moment of my life, Scorpius being born being my first best. I lean over Harry and pick his glasses up from the side. I ran my finger around the frame.

"Oh Harry, why do you still have these glasses."

I chuckled and put them in my draw. I focused my attention back on him. He had thrown the covers off himself, showing his very beautiful body. I put one of my hands on his left shoulder blade and follow the curves of him. I stop when I get to the top of his leg. He's stirring.

"Where am I?"

"In my bed Harry."

"WHAT THE FUCK!"

He's getting out of my bed and looking around for his clothes. I can't help but laugh. He's seriously hooked on me now.

"Stop laughing at me and help me!"

"Why should I? It's not like you're late for anything. It's not the next day you know Harry."

"Ah.."

He drops the clothes he's managed to find [which isn't that much] and joins me. He kisses me then stops, sporting a puzzled look on his face.

"Where are my glasses?"

"Why do you still have them?"

"Where are they?"

"Why don't you get some knew ones. Yeah, let's go out now and get some."

"Draco! Where are they?"

I lower my hand down and open the draw. I feel around for them and then pull them out. Harry reaches out for them but I stop him."

"Give me them."

"Only if you come with me now to get new ones."

"But… … … Fine!"

I pull him into a tight embrace. This is going to be the start of a great relationship. What could go wrong? I get out of bed and choose some clothes from my wardrobe.

"What's wrong with the clothes you were wearing before?" Harry asks.

"Seriously Harry, you don't expect me to wear them after that! Oh that also reminds me, your clothes are crap."

"Thanks a lot."

"We'll get you some new ones."

"In other words you want me to dress like you."

"No, I want you to dress in something that will show off the amazingness of you."

"And what do I tell Ginny when I go home with all the new gear."

"Just tell her that I got you it. She'll understand."

"And you know that how?"

"She was telling me how terrible you dress!"

"Oh thanks a lot!"

"No problem, any time."

I love Harry. He loves me, he might not know it yet but he will.


	5. For All The Wrong Reasons

_Extinction of Love is Afoot. _

Chapter 5 – For All The Wrong Reasons

I decided to go back to work. I have been off for the past half year. I work in the department of Magical Accidents and Catastrophes. It was my job in that department that killed Pansy. There is no point talking about how she died, it will be always scarred on my memory. My office is part of The Obliviator Headquarters sector. That's basically erasing the memories of muggles who have seen something that is connected to the magical world using the spell 'Obliviate'. My department is on the third floor of the ministry.

The one and only reason why I am returning to work is so I can see Harry. I don't need the money for I already have a lot of it. Harry works in the Department of Magical Law Enforcement which is on the floor below mine, not very far to go. His specific area is in the Auror Office for he is an Auror. Everyone looks up to him, he's just too good.

I returned on a Monday. I had forgotten how busy it could be! Everyone waved at me, smiled, even just nodded. When I was last here people wouldn't even look at me, they cowered away. I didn't know how to react to this positive attention. I made my escape to the elevator. It was empty, I wasn't bothered. Just as the doors were closing a man just made it through. He was dressed smartly and was clearly out of breath. I wanted to ask him if he was ok but I may have scared him. He stood up strait and turned around. I couldn't believe it.

"Hi Draco, welcome back."

"Hey Harry. Thank-you."

The dreaded silence fell over us. It wasn't long till he left. I sighed, don't know why, it wasn't like I wanted him to leave.

When the elevator got to my floor I rushed out and I went strait into my office, ignoring the hellos from my co-workers. I sat myself down at my desk. _Why did I have to come back?_ Was all I thought. I sat back in my chair and saw all the papers on my desk. I had a lot of sorting out and completing to do. I knew that they wouldn't be all sympathetic and get someone else to do it. I had been off work for months and that was way over long enough for me to get over Pansy's death.

I decided to get on with the papers. If I had never started they would have gathered dust and look a mess. After 3 hours my desk was spotless and I was up to date with everything that I had missed. I felt so hungry so I headed down to the food hall to get something to eat. Once I grabbed my food I went back to my office, I couldn't sit in the hall with everybody staring at me.

When I got back into my office I found a file on my desk.

"For fucks sake."

I decided not to look at it until I had a break. I put my feet on the desk and relaxed back into my chair. I ate my food then found I was terribly thirsty. I had not bought a drink and wondered what to do. Then I remembered that I had a bottle of fire whiskey in the bottom drawer of my filing cabinet. I unlocked it and saw it strait away. A smile spread across my face. I broke off the cap and moved the bottle to my lips. The liquid poured out and I felt refreshed and all my stress seemed to have slipped away. At that moment the door opened.

"Draco."

I turned around and hid the bottle behind my back.

"Oh, Hello Minister. How are you?"

"I'm fine thank-you. I'm glad to see you back and that you've got all your work sorted out. I know it's probly been a long day for you already but there is something I need you to do."

"Yes Minister and what may that be?"

"There's been a few cases of muggle related magic and I need you to go through the reports to see if anyone needs to have their memory swiped. Is that ok?"

"Yes Minister. How many reports are there?"

"About 132 I think."

"132?!"

"Don't worry, I don't expect you to do it on your own. I've sent someone else there as well."

"I was going to say, I don't think I wouldn't have gotten through them all. Where's the room?"

"It's on the second floor in room 14 of the Auror Office."

"I'll head there immediately."

"I knew you would. Goodbye Draco."

"Bye Minister."

_Great, just great. More work. I shouldn't complain, I was expecting it but 132 reports?! And only two people going through them? Is the minister mad? I suppose I have to get it done. It will keep my mind off things._

I reached the Auror Office and walked down the corridor till I got to room 14. Once in I realised how stuffy it was. It was slightly humid and small. The air-conditioning system seemed to have broken. I took off my cloak and loosened my tie.

"Well, lets get this over with." I said to myself.

10 minutes later I had gotten through 2 reports. I heard the door open and so I said;

"Finally, I thought you would never arrive. The minister is crazy, thinking we can get all these sorted out so quick."

No reply came and I began to grow worried that it was the minister himself. I took a deep breath and looked behind me.

"Oh, Harry, hey."

_Well isn't this marvellous._

"Lets get this done quick, I want to go home." Said Harry.

"And what's put you in a bad mood?"

"Shut up."

I felt rather taken aback. Why was he being so rude? I decided to carry on with my work and ignore him since he'd decided to block me out. I picked up the 3rd report and read through it. I slightly chuckled because of the magic that was preformed.

"What's so funny?"

"Just this wizard, what a complete buffoon."

"That's not the type of approach a member of the Ministry of Magic should use."  
"Well I'm sorry you all high and mighty twat."

"What's that for?"

Harry rose out of his seat and came over to me. I stood up. I was taller so intimidating him was going to be an easy job.

"How dare you have the cheek to be all proper about one little laugh when you, my lover, have blanked me out each time we've come across each other. What have I done wrong? The other day I thought we'd gone over this? I thought we were fine."

"Things aren't fine Draco. I've slept with you, I've cheated on Ginny. Do you have any idea what this would do to her and my family if they ever found out? And don't call me your lover!"

"But they won't find out Harry. It's our little secret. I'll call you what I like. Anyway, I don't know why you're so wound up about it. It's not like you love me or anything… Harry?"

He put his hands on his head and he looked as though he was about to cry. He then suddenly came up very close to me and looked into my eyes.

"I want you Draco. You don't know how bad I want you. All day and night I think about you. When I masturbate it's you. When me and Ginny have sex I think about you. Do you realise how wrong this is? Do you realise that all this time that I shouldn't have been living a lie because now I'm stuck in so deep I don't know how to get out………….. I love you."

………I didn't know what to say. He said it all so fast. There was so much information to take in. I didn't know what to do with it so I did the thing which I knew wouldn't screw this up. I let my lips fall on his and I held him in a tight embrace. He didn't fail me, he kissed back and began to grow rough. I eventually let go of him and pushed all the reports off the table. I kissed Harry again as I unfastened his trouser buttons. Once done I pulled them down and pulled his boxers down. He bent over the desk and I in turn dropped my trousers and boxers. My dick was already hard, which was a bonus. I put myself in Harry and he tried to keep his moan to a minimum. His knuckles had turned white from the pressure that he was holding onto the table with. Once the pain had stopped he began to lightly pant and gently said my name.

"Oh, oh Draco. I love you so much."

Just hearing him say that he loved me turned me on and made me want to fuck him that little bit harder. I banged him and banged him until I came all inside of him. I laughed and brought myself out. I sat down in the chair and caught my breath. Harry rested on the floor and had a smile across his face.

We knew it wouldn't be long till someone came and checked on us so we soon got dressed and got back to work.

"I wish you hadn't of thrown these reports on the floor Harry. It's highly unprofessional of you."

"Me?" he said in an alarming voice.

"Yes, you."

We laughed and kissed and lived happily ever after.

Well, that's what I wished.


	6. Blaise Zabini

**A/N- Hey, sorry for not updating this story for a while.**

_Resist and You Shall Be Rewarded_

Chapter 6 – Blaise Zabini

I walk in through the front door and chuck my keys on the sideboard. I sigh and smile. Today I have had sex with Harry, again! He confessed his true feelings to me and everything seems to be falling into place.

I'm thirsty and so walk to the kitchen. Tonight I won't drink. I want to stay sober. I decide to have a glass of water. I turn on the tap and let it run for a while. I grab a glass from the cabinet and let it fill up. I drink it all, without stopping. I turn off the tap and put down the glass. Tonight is a full moon and its light is shining through the window. I look out at the moon and smile. I begin to fantasise.

My thoughts are ruined by a knock at the front door. I'm puzzled as to who it could be. I'm not expecting anyone. I approach the door and open it slowly. Oh my god.

"Hey Draco. How's things?"

"Blaise?"

"Yes, Blaise. Going to invite me in?"

He walks past me and I close the door. I can't believe that he's here. The last time I saw him was in Hogwarts when he broke up with me.

"Nice place you got here Draco."

"Thanks. How'd you find me?"

"I went round to your parents and they told me. Your son is cute."

I walk past him and into the living room. I sit down on my chair and indicate for him to sit across from me. He smiles and something in me twists. I don't understand why he would be here. He said he never wanted to talk to me again when he found out that I was with him just to piss off Harry. This is all a shock to me, him turning up here.

"How are you Draco? I heard about Pansy. I'm sorry."

"I'm fine, fantastic even and it's ok."

"Want to talk about it?"

"Not really."

"Fair enough."

We just sit there in silence. I don't know what to say to him, how to act, what to do. He must realise how strange this is for me.

"What are you doing here Blaise? As I recall you said you never wanted to talk to me again."

"I was just a kid back then. Kids say anything when they're angry. I've changed. I understand your actions back then and I forgive you."

"Ok."

I stand up, not being able to take any of this in. I walk over to the drinks cabinet. I'm so tempted to break open a bottle but I promised myself I wouldn't. I feel Blaise behind me. He wraps his arms around my waist and rests his head on my shoulder.

"What are you doing?"

"Draco, I've missed you, more then I could ever have possibly imagined. I want you back. I should never have let you go. You are all I can think about."

I shake him off me and take a step back from him. I can't believe what I'm hearing. Two people in one day admit they want to be with me. If I was back at Hogwarts I would have loved to be in that situation and play one person off against the other. But times have changed and I've grown up. I don't need to be with Blaise. I have Harry now.

"Blaise, this is all a bit much. I mean, you turning up out of no-where and saying this. You have to understand that I'm a bit suspicious and I have to think about it."

"What's to think about? You're single, lonely. You need the love and company Draco, no-one else is giving it to you."

"I know, I know. It's just that it's a lot you're offering. I'm tired; I've had a long day at work. I need to sleep on it."

"Ok, fair enough. I'll see you around tomorrow."

"I'm working."

"Again I say I'll see you around."

"Bye Blaise."

"Bye Draco."

I watch him leave the living room and moments later I hear the front door close. My mind is all over the place. I don't understand why it should be. I'm happy with what I have going for me. Everything is fine. Why would I want to accept his offer? Strange…

…

My limbs are aching and I decide to have a bath. As the bath-tub is filling up I strip down. I look at myself in the mirror. I'm surprised. My skin is glowing. I think it's because I'm happy.

I turn off the hot water and step into the bath. The heat is soothing. I sink deep into the water, letting it surround me and take away the pain. I think about everything that's happened to me throughout my life. So many bad things have happened to me. It's about time karma repaid me.

…

I'm just about to fall asleep when someone knocks at my front door for a second time. I get out of bed, pull on some pj bottoms and make my way downstairs. The knocking is loud and continuous. "I'm coming!" I shout. I rub the sleep from my eyes, unlock the door and open it to find Harry. His face is red; I can tell he has been crying.

"Harry… What's the matter?"

"I, I can't do it Draco."

"Do what?"

"Me and you."

"Oh god, not this again Harry."

He looks at his feet then into my eyes. Tears are falling from his beautiful green eyes and all I want to is make him feel better. I reach out to him but he pushes my hand away. This hurts me.

"Harry, what the fuck has happened now?"

"It's Ginny. She needs me now, more then ever."

"Why?"

"She's…."

"She's what Harry?"

"She's pregnant ok! I can't put her though any hurt, pain, suffering."

"She's…pregnant?"

I feel as though he's just cast the cruciatus curse at me. My legs are giving in on me and I fall to the floor. My world is falling apart. How can he do this to me? How can he have sex with her?

"Harry, .fuck?"

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have fucked you around like this."

"Too right you shouldn't!"

"If it helps, I really do love you."

"How dare you say that? Of course that doesn't help! It makes it worse! Piss off! NOW!"

I stand up and slam the door in his face. Something flares up within me. He's hurt me when I never thought he could. What do I do now, without him? Oh, I'm falling apart.

…

I sit in my old leather chair with a glass of the finest whiskey in my hand. I'm halfway through the bottle. I'm trying to drown out the pain but I can't. I had him. I finally had the only man I have ever truly loved and he dumped me. What's wrong with me? Unless there's something wrong with him… He can't get away with what he's done. I want him to see what he's missing.

I stand, not very steadily and focus my thoughts on Blaise. I disapparate. I find myself in a nice little apartment. I look around and see Blaise sleeping. I walk over to him. The whiskey is still in my hand and I finish it off, liquid courage.

"Blaise."

He stirs. I will for him to wake up. He opens his eyes and slightly flinches.

"Draco? What are you doing here? It's far too early."

"I've made up my mind."

I get into the bed next to him and run my hand over his face. I look into his eyes and kiss him gently. He smiles. My plan is set into action.


	7. Foundations

_Fight through the pain to build the walls of hate._

Chapter 7 – Foundations

I wish I could explain why I have all of a sudden become so foolish, childish, why I have become so ready to throw away all the progress. Scorpius deserves better than me, that's for sure. I look down at Blaise, sleeping with a smile on his face. I know he is going to be one big mistake all over again. I know that the game I'm about to play is going to end badly for all of us. I guess if you ask me at the end of all this why I did what I did I probably still won't be able to answer you.

I stood and got dressed. The game has already begun and I can't have Blaise waking to find me next to him. That would mean that we are a couple... I can't have that with him ever again.

...

I walk out of the Zabini apartment, turning on my phone, dodging people on the London streets. 3 texts and 5 voicemails appear on my screen; a majority from Harry. I delete them all because I don't want to hear his excuses. He can't seem to make up his mind. Oh how it frustrates me so. I turn the corner onto Oxford Street and slip into Debenhams. At the cafe I order an espresso and wait on a table by a rather big window. My brain needs to run at a more rapid rate.

A cute waiter brings over my drink. He asks if I need anything else to which I reply no; to my dismay of course. At any other time in my life I would have probably asked for his number but not now, not now that my plans are in action. I take the single espresso in one shot, not thinking of is temperature and sourness. My phone rings, a picture of Harry appears on the screen of my Samsung Galaxy S. Do I answer. Yes.

"Hello?"

"Draco..."

"Yes?"

"Are you going to listen to me or be a fucking arse?"

"Language Harry. I have been polite so far so do not assume that I'm not listening."

"Fine. Fine. Where have you been all night? I've been trying to get hold of you."

"No-where that would interest you Harry. What do you want?"

"You've been invited to the Hogwarts reunion of our year. Letters haven't gone out yet but I was told at work this morning. I thought I'd let you know."

"Oooook then. I could have just found out when I received the letter."

"You don't have to act like that Draco. I thought I'd tell you beforehand because I know how much you like to prepare. "

"You really didn't have to tell me. I will have plenty of time. Hmmm I could go with Blaise."

And with that comment I hang up the phone with a smile on my face. Leaving Harry to wonder is something I didn't think of before and quite frankly I quite like it.

...

I apparate to my parents. Scorpius runs at me with unnatural-like speed and I pick him up, hugging him close.

"I've missed you father."

"I've missed you to."

The old man Lucius walks towards me with a limp. He gained that injury in the last battle with he who must not be named. All he does is smile, turns and walks back inside. I see my mother preparing lunch in the kitchen. Unlike my father she has a bad reaction when she sees me.

"Draco! You've stopped out all night and haven't even gone home to clean up?"

How my mother always knows? It eludes me.

"It's fine mother. I stayed with Blaise."

"Did you now?"

I turn to see my father raising a quizzical eyebrow. I know from now on they will go over everything that happened at school.

"Draco, darling, please don't tell me you're having these delusions again?"

"Mother, they are not delusions! I have been gay all my life! Pansy knew it. She even talked to you about it. Stop denying it. I am who I am. Get over it."

"Son, what your mother and I mean is that you're not thinking straight. You've gone through a rough time. You just need to ease back into things without going insane."

"You are seriously giving me this talk? I can't believe you two. You've never been able to accept me for who I am. I never wanted to serve that fucking stupid idiot Voldemort but you forced me. I'm gay; get over it. Now, I've come to tell you that I shall be going to the Hogwarts Reunion whenever it is and I shall be going with Blaise. Until then i'm going to spend every day with my son. You will get to see him when I go out to the reunion. Is that clear?"

My parents nod at me. My point is established. Time to plan an outfit.


End file.
